Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The things you wouldn't know just by looking at me

My father in law one night during the prayer before a meal included this sentence in his prayer:

"I spiritually adopt all the babies that will be murdered today through abortion, God we pray for those babies."

He knows I've had an abortion. 

I was consumably angry and left the house to smoke (at the time, I smoked 2 packs a day.)  His wife, Nate's mom came out to talk me down, and her words were almost if not equally as alarming.

"He feels so passionately about it, Becca, and he didn't mean to hurt you. He just forgets that you did that because you just aren't the type."

the type?

hmmm... I didn't know there was a type.

What I think she was getting at was, just by looking at me, you wouldn't say "that girl has had an abortion." but what does that girl look like.  I close my eyes, and ask my imagination to draw a picture of what "the girl who had an abortion" looks like.  I see me.   But, I can understand how most people wouldn't see me, or anyone for that matter. 

Do you see some sketched out drug addict, do you see some young 13 year old girl with her whole life ahead of her, do you see a homeless woman without the means to support herself let alone a child, do you see a business woman in a power suit who won't let this unexpected pregnancy ruin her epic rise to the top?

WE CANT SEE ANYONE! because there isn't a face. We can more easily exclude someone from the type than we can include.  But even that is unreliable at best.  I might be excluded based on my religion, my children, my marital status, my home life, bank account, etc.  But you would be wrong.

So what else might you not think about me?
1. I have been married before, and Divorced.
2. I obviously had an abortion, but I was already a mom, a christian, and I was married.
3. I Smoked cigarettes and pot and drank, and tried other drugs multiple times in my past.
4. I wasn't a virgin when I got married (any of the times I got married)
5. I stole more merchandise from stores than I could even begin to count!
6. I have tattoos, lots of them

I don't tell you this, so your opinion will change of me, I don't care honestly what any judgmental person might think of me.  I tell you this to help eliminate stereotypes.  This CAN NOT GO ON!

I want other people to not feel "different" because they are imperfect!

God's gift is completion.  Whatever you lack he Completes.  I tell you this so you know that God had a lot of completing to do with me.  I wasn't easy to forgive.  I had a lot, most likely "more" than you did or do.  But he paid the price... and he didn't even look at the bill... Just said "here, put it on this" and handed me his death and resurrection to pay for it. My debts- cancelled, even my abortion. 

Who have you kept secrets from, in order to keep an image that isn't even you? Who have you judged based on what they look like, or talk like?

I want to move up and on... not stay where I am at! Who's with me? Who will be an open book, a fearless exception to stereotype!

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